Managing Your Move to or in Tulsa: Expectations vs. Reality--Part 102/18/2018Moving is the grown-up equal of high school—everyone is super zealous about the prospect, but it's only the folks with down-to-earth expectations who end up having a good time. Sure, it is a new house, a new beginning, and the prospect of a wonderful new life--but once that last empty moving truck pulls away and you're standing there in the middle of your boxes, you've still got to do the real work. Managing your move with realistic expectations is essential to starting that new life on the right foot--and that means not only coming to terms with the fact that a new home will not magically suck up the thirty pounds you have good intentions to lose, but that moving is emotionally draining even in good circumstances and you and your family should set aside the time and space to accept that. One of the odd things about a local move--new house, neighborhoods, schools--is that can be harder on the kids than a long-distance relocation. A new home hundreds of miles away removes the constant requests to go see their friends in the old neighborhood, and it is less difficult to welcome a new life and new friends when your old ones are in a different time zone. But back to the topic. There are three Ps to think about when managing your move to or in Tulsa--Purge, Pack, and Pay. What you do not purge must be packed, and the more you pack, the more you will pay. Expectation—I will go through old stuff and only keep what I love. Reality--you love lots more than you think you do. Whether you do your own packing or employ professional movers, you've got to choose what is worth the time and money to pack and move. Purge Purging is one of those strange terms you do not hear very often, at least in a good implication. But really, letting go of the old baggage is one of the smartest ways so that you can empower your new abode to bestow your expectations of greatness. There are hundreds of directions and pointers to assist you in figuring out the best methods to sort through your old items, from pragmatic--"if you haven't used/worn it in a year get rid of it"; to a little less traditional--"toss all your negative energy out with the old towels". At its simplest level, purging is simply going through all the cupboards, closets and drawers and making three piles: take with you, throw away, donate. Or you may have four piles if you have got a lot of next-to-new things that you don't want anymore, and consign those items. A troublesome thing about purging is maintaining the detachment it requires to be relentless about tossing things. If you stored all those pre-school paintings, how can you toss them and be a great parent? Here's how—appoint a friend to help you pick through items and talk you through why you are saving items that are really better out of the house. Having someone else ask you out loud why you want to hang on to the 1980s cassette tapes does put things in perspective and you'll have a pain-free time growing the throw away pile if you've got someone to back-up your decisions. If your significant other is the one with the pack rat inclinations, here is a suggestion for assisting a reluctant partner part with their treasures. Think small, and start with the kitchen junk drawers, try to limit handling of old matchbooks and broken screwdrivers to one time only and progressively make your way to larger things, like collections (for example, choose two or three porcelain bunnies and donate or consign the rest). Join us next time as we review managing your move topics: Pack and Pay, in Part 2 of this blog series.